Some Assembly Required – Retro B-Movie Robot Mechanic T-Shirt

Stranded. Confused. Out of warranty.

Meet Model XR-7B, Galactic Motors' finest spaceship mechanic, sitting in the dirt next to his very much not-fixed flying saucer, clutching an "I NEED OIL AND A HUG" mug and staring at assembly instructions written in a language he clearly doesn't speak. His own internal monologue isn't helping either — "Step 1: Unfold wings. Step 2: Don't ask."

"Some Assembly Required" is the vintage B-movie poster treatment for anyone who's ever opened a box of flat-pack furniture and immediately regretted every life choice that led them there. Distressed 1950s creature-feature type, a scattered toolbox, loose bolts everywhere, smoke pouring from the wreckage behind him, and a "FEATURING! Smoke! Sparks! Loose Bolts! Existential Dread!" call-out box that says it all. "Released in glorious black & white — because color is expensive."

Details:

• High-contrast, distressed vintage movie-poster print
• Soft, breathable cotton tee — true to size, unisex fit
• Screen-printed for long-lasting color and detail
• Designed and printed to order

For sci-fi poster collectors, retro robot fans, and anyone who's ever sat down in defeat next to something they were supposed to have built by now. 

100 Material: 100% Cotton | Pattern: Graphic Print
% Cotton Medium-weight 5.3 oz/yd² (180 g/m²), tubular knit construction,
ribbed collar and shoulder tape
Dual printing: DTF (sleeves/inner neck) + DTG (main design) for crisp detail
Tear-away Product Features
label, OEKO-TEX® STANDARD 100 certified

Care Instructions
Machine wash cold (max 30°C/90°F), non-chlorine bleach as needed, tumble dry low heat, do not iron, do not dry-clean

General Product Safety Regulation (GPSR)
EU representative: HONSON VENTURES LIMITED,
 gpsr@honsonventures.com, 3 Gnaftis House Flat 102,
Mesa Geitonia, 4003, Limassol, CY

Product: Gildan 5000. Made in Nicaragua. For adult use.
Covered by a 2-year warranty in the EU and Northern Ireland per Directive 1999/44/EC.